Zoetrope

there’s a storm coming
the brain tells me
as it slams against the skull bone
and no amount of oil is going to separate
thought from wishes
– until the storm arrives
i will feel waves crashing into the wharf

the lesson never ends
class is never dismissed until
life calls you home
the years we spend are in search of ourselves
that education within – self awareness
joining something more than us
while trying to connect
and sometimes staying alone
avoiding loneliness

perhaps this is why they say suicide is a waste
that we abruptly ended a lesson
but perhaps it’s the loneliness within
that couldn’t separate thought from pain

perhaps we live until that lesson is learned
and once we understand we can step back and bow –
but more likely life is just life and the adventure is in itself
and departing before it’s time requires a final lesson before
it is truly done or judged –
therefore it is not a waste but a distance within a marathon
– acceptance looking to soothe the pain

and i believed i collected these stories of my childhood kept the toys…

that i would retell them at bedtime across the walls of a child’s room
retell tales of life and comic books
so their dreams would be more than what the schoolyard taught them

but i’ve realized now
you collected your own toys to reminisce
as therapy for your own childhood lost beyond the shoreline
and our lessons are not to be told before closing curtains of imagination
but to ourselves
still trying to grow beyond – before we grow too old

and that is my biggest worry
beyond the wharf and into that storm

beyond a wishful need of what neither could afford
– that worry is me

weary that life has not been lived properly
that the sea will call me home
and the last portion of our adventures you will spend with someone
whom i will have share with – in the in between

and i can not begrudge you that need because I do not want you to know loneliness vs being alone

no oil can separate logic from worry
wasted time becomes an old man still searching
in realization one can never be called home until it’s time for supper –
time for the porch light to come on

that pain and self infliction does not dictate whether the bread crumbs
are lost on the path because old teachings say it must be so….

this is life until the eyes close to whatever physical truth finally closes them
and until then – time must be taken towards that self awareness

childhood interrupted by adulthood

the early years of so much sickness and death
holds a bearing on the present –
the story kept closed and off the walls of a lost dream…
opens to another story
played out in final judgment
where no one here will see or remember
 
and whomever must play the reel to reel
will show that self awareness was achieved

fear did not poison the living water

the storm was only a portion of the full story…..

The Swim

when she swims
and the pool pulls her form
rectangular in the deep end
disappearing over the lines at the  bottom
a race that stretches her body
until her frame pops up piercing
and grabbing the side to wipe her face
while it all slides down over and away
wishing she will return

• myself wishing to join….

Moonlamp

it’s always night or we wouldn’t need light
tiki the backyard with patio lanterns
string solar flares down the clothesline
pay the fines and start a bonfire
dance around the piano and sit back down

• it’s always night or we wouldn’t need light…

if it weren’t for the light
if it weren’t for the night

…if it weren’t for midnight

oh Alaska
oh North Bay

• oh Theo…

…it’s always

It’s Always night or we wouldn’t need light – Quote by Theolonious Monk

In Sunset

the ocean is a sea of cars
20 floors up wishing for 19 more
waves crashing into horns
lights flooding the shoreline
she lays on the bed belly down
and the whitecap reflection plays on the sun set
i watch her as much as i look outside
and when she rolls onto her back
i blush knowing traffic is returning to normal
that the ocean is no longer in our travels
but that she is the greatest adventure
my imagination will try to understand

In Sunset: inspired by ‘in sunlight’ by  Russian photographer Vladimir Nikolaev

UnApolOgeticAlly

she’s not going to
NOT strut her stuff
she’s tired of hiding in shame
climbing through stone fences
trying to re-enter the
kingdom

now that she knows what stuff
she STRUTS she’s going to put on
war paint
she’s going to make a peacock a companion
and hold the bird the way a woman I
know holds onto her dog

like a
child

In this world you have to fight
fight for your RIGHT
pick up a weapon without shame
abort heaven knowing
hell

in understanding
this
she’s going to TEASE

un
apol
ogetic
ally

– until Adam or Adam’s God
gets IT.

Religion

Which is art
the painting or
Me

Which is serious
the ukulele or
Piano

Which is truth
hetero or
God

Is it
understanding or
the love of Understanding

The love to
understand or
the evolution of the Word itself?

At The Card Game

So what started the fight Monroy?

Officer
he told me he knew what
my costume was gonna be this
halloween

which was?

A rooster mask
while I carried a
lollipop

Meaning?

Think about it officer
put a little british thought into it

He called you a cocksucker?

Worse officer – he implied i was a liar and a cheat.

The Winery

She’s looking for the stairs to heaven
leaves the wine cellar so the grapes can focus –
in the garden she sleeps to re find Adam
and in the sunflower fields she dresses in the light.
In another month
the grapes will be ready
she will remind God that water can never be barreled
and that life is never ending.
When the doors to the garden are opened
she will push the pillars aside
and listen to them creak.
Adam will be waiting and ready
stumble for a moment as he gazes upon the woman
he loves more than his master –
or at least as equally in her human form
and Eve
will greet him knowing the stairs will be shared
and that the stairs have been found.

Based on some of the imagery by photographer Andy Katz: Andy Katz’s love of photography takes him around the globe. From the deserts of Namibia to the disappearing Jewish World of Eastern Europe to the rolling hills of the California wine country…

Andy’s imagery has been featured on the covers of Doobie Brothers and Dan Fogelberg Albums. Over 6 million albums sold. Katz’s work is also featured in museums and galleries worldwide including his gallery in Healdsburg, California.

Katz has published 12 beautiful coffee table books, they have been described by vintners, photographers, critics and other readers as breathtaking.

She makes him crazy

she drives him crazy
dropping that sun dress
spaghetti straps off shoulder
a butterfly effect floating past her hips
and she
stands here at the edge of the bluffs
a cliff 1000 feet up in the air
overlooking the water and the tiny
specks – boats floating in the water
she’s
on the bluff in the sun
not bluffing
in a large white sun hat
tipped
down hiding her eyes
speckled silhouette shadows
spackling her body
downwards from the little pinholes
that sun hat
a straw hat
working in her favour
as the wind tickles the white rim
flipping
the material
the brow of the sun hat
revealing her
smile
ready to look back up at you
the cocoon
ruffled or rumpled
on the ground around her ankles
her toes playing with the
body vale
crumpled
the spaghetti straps buried
knowing
she’s
driving you –
him
crazy…

Fingers writing in the Sand

A weak Christian believes
there is only 1 true religion
that atheism does not have its place
and politics must be the source of truth to push one ideology
while gaining personal wealth.

Within this weakness is the inability to grow beyond personal opinion
believing anyone opposing 1 set of beliefs must be against them personally.
Here lies the inability to discuss and grow,
holding so dearly to values that will
never mature.

This is where the devil not only waits but
has been whispering on the shoulder since the beginning
knowing part of you was
listening.